A sentiment I can understand

Just saw this wonderful wall sticker on anything goes.

"I love you more than sleep" by Robert Ryan.

If I ever say this to someone, you'll know it's serious.

What are the mice in my head drinking...

As I walked to the bathroom today, I looked down at my freshly doubled-knotted shoelaces and instantly thought: "Oh no! I've tied my shoes too tight—now how will I go to the bathroom?" 

My second thought was: "Why did I just think that?"  Was I planning on taking off my pants? Did I get confused and think that one went to the bathroom with their feet? Was I channeling Britney Spears right before she walks into a gas station restroom? 

 

Why mom, why?

Just writing that title leads me to believe this could be a recurring installment. Anywho, shortly after my last post, I went home to Sandy to visit the family. Upon walking into my house, I noticed that all my mother's porcelain dolls were naked, laying side-by-side on the couch. My first thought was: "Oh my god, the dolls have retaliated, eaten my family, and are now enjoying a post-bloodbath-orgy-nap." Before I had time to smother the dolls with a pillow (my second thought) or light the entire house on fire thus cleansing the area of such demonic possession, my mom informed me that she was washing their clothes. How dolls sitting on shelves for 20 years get "dirty" is beyond me, but I'm pretty sure she had something to do with it.